To Russia, With Good Riddance

Photo by Nikita Karimov on Unsplash

With all this so-called “wokeness” permeating American society, it must be difficult to be a republican these days.

It’s got to be tough being groomed to believe Critical Race Theory (CRT) is being taught in public schools.

Teaching the history of American slavery might make people feel badly about themselves.

A cabal of Satan-worshipping Democrats engaging in pedophilia and drinking children’s blood is bound to upset.

The attempted coup against our government Donald Trump instigated to halt the peaceful transition of power was just a leisurely “tourist visit”, don’t you know.

And white Christians are being “replaced”.

Ask a typical republican, and he or she will probably claim to be the “victim” of the country’s “liberal agenda”.

So there should be a safe haven, an Ellis Island of sorts, for disenfranchised republicans.

Well, tell that whiny “Christian” right-winger at work always complaining about trans people there may soon be a safe haven for him and his fellow bigots.

That’s right, since Russian dictator Vladimir Putin is such a bad-ass among GOP circles, republicans fed up with Ukraine-defending America can get closer to him in a new Russian village, a “bastion for ‘traditional’ moral values” outside Moscow, being constructed to accommodate about 200 American and Canadian families.

As reported in RIA Novosti, Russian immigration lawyer Timur Beslangurov argues the reason for the accommodations is “the inculcation of radical values: Today they [the US and Canada] have 70 genders; it is not known what will happen next.”

Beslangurov added that most of those seeking entrance into the village are Catholics who “strongly believe in the prediction that Russia will remain the only Christian country in the world.”

In September, Vladimir Putin signed a decree warning about a “battle for cultural supremacy,” and “the aggressive imposition of neoliberal views by a number of states.”

According to the Federal Security Service, foreign immigration to Russia grew 17.6% in the first quarter of 2023 compared to the same time period last year.

Many of those immigrants are from China and Central European countries like Uzbekistan and Kazakhstan.

Now American and Canadian right-wingers can join them in what is sure to be a (Christian) white supremacy utopia.

Bon voyage, MAGATs!